Guess What?! I'm Back Home!
Chicken has problems with writing and sixth grade is forcing us to do something about it. I have met with his Language Arts teacher and her advice is "He just needs to learn how to do it, you can't graduate from high school without passing the writing exam." So helpful, that one. Because my ultimate goal for my child is to be able to write competently enough to pass a California high school written exam. The pinnacle of achievement there, huh? Chicken describes her as "mediocre" at best.
This teacher, let's call her Mrs. Pelson, okay? Great, I'm glad we're on the same page. Mrs. Pelson understands that Chicken has difficulties in the arena of writing and we (as his parents) are actively pursuing this to get him the help he needs. So when Chicken writes an answer in class that is very short and to the point and Mrs. Pelson holds it up and announces that "someone is a minimalist" in a hurtful manner I get a little bent out of shape. Chicken came home really upset that day and there is going to be some shit flying around the Chicken school fairly soon. What I didn't know was how much my kid's balls have dropped in the last month.
Chicken was assigned to write an essay on The Phantom Tollbooth by Mrs. Pelson, and received 50/50 points on the paper. The title? "Not A Minimalist" Ha ha ha ha. I love that kid. I have included the essay below as an example of what he can do when he is able to get the words in his brain down on paper. I bolded a few sentences that made me chuckle. Chicken really is my kid.
The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Jester is both a book and a movie. It is a very unique book in the way that Milo, the main character, Tock, and other people in the plot help to convey the main idea; you will never amount to anything without a proper education. If you are one of those people who thinks that the book is always better than the movie, I would normally say, "It depends." In this case the book is 100 percent better. Now this is really saying something because the book itself makes me want to hide under my bed; the movie makes me wish that people had still been half-evolved chimps in the 1970's. Even those idiotic primates could have done it better. Sadly, it is very true.
Gladly the book is different from the movie. For example, Milo doesn't meet Officer Shrift until he reaches Dictionopolis. In addition, Tock's clock is clearly visible, not obscured by layers of fat. Another difference is that the Valley of Sound is only featured in the book. The book also doesn't make me feel a sudden urge to shove my head down a toilet bowl.
The movie was also different like how they never mention a character by the name of RAUW. One more thing is that the video has a cheesy theme song. The book, just like every other one, does not. Milo also has a friend that he talks to shortly before going to Wisdom. The original story doesn't feature that poor little boy.
Yes, there are things that they have in common. Not many, but a few. For example, Humbug told the Spelling Bee to spell "balderdash." In both stories they do mention my favorite character the Dodecahedron. A dodecahedron is a twelve-sided mathematical shape. Also, letters grow in orchards in Dictionopolis. This is unfortunately the end of this paper, because I feel that this paper already has enough commentary.
This teacher, let's call her Mrs. Pelson, okay? Great, I'm glad we're on the same page. Mrs. Pelson understands that Chicken has difficulties in the arena of writing and we (as his parents) are actively pursuing this to get him the help he needs. So when Chicken writes an answer in class that is very short and to the point and Mrs. Pelson holds it up and announces that "someone is a minimalist" in a hurtful manner I get a little bent out of shape. Chicken came home really upset that day and there is going to be some shit flying around the Chicken school fairly soon. What I didn't know was how much my kid's balls have dropped in the last month.
Chicken was assigned to write an essay on The Phantom Tollbooth by Mrs. Pelson, and received 50/50 points on the paper. The title? "Not A Minimalist" Ha ha ha ha. I love that kid. I have included the essay below as an example of what he can do when he is able to get the words in his brain down on paper. I bolded a few sentences that made me chuckle. Chicken really is my kid.
The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Jester is both a book and a movie. It is a very unique book in the way that Milo, the main character, Tock, and other people in the plot help to convey the main idea; you will never amount to anything without a proper education. If you are one of those people who thinks that the book is always better than the movie, I would normally say, "It depends." In this case the book is 100 percent better. Now this is really saying something because the book itself makes me want to hide under my bed; the movie makes me wish that people had still been half-evolved chimps in the 1970's. Even those idiotic primates could have done it better. Sadly, it is very true.
Gladly the book is different from the movie. For example, Milo doesn't meet Officer Shrift until he reaches Dictionopolis. In addition, Tock's clock is clearly visible, not obscured by layers of fat. Another difference is that the Valley of Sound is only featured in the book. The book also doesn't make me feel a sudden urge to shove my head down a toilet bowl.
The movie was also different like how they never mention a character by the name of RAUW. One more thing is that the video has a cheesy theme song. The book, just like every other one, does not. Milo also has a friend that he talks to shortly before going to Wisdom. The original story doesn't feature that poor little boy.
Yes, there are things that they have in common. Not many, but a few. For example, Humbug told the Spelling Bee to spell "balderdash." In both stories they do mention my favorite character the Dodecahedron. A dodecahedron is a twelve-sided mathematical shape. Also, letters grow in orchards in Dictionopolis. This is unfortunately the end of this paper, because I feel that this paper already has enough commentary.
posted by Sam at
4:37 PM
1 Comments:
Chicken's essay may be heartwarming for the parent - I am reminded of the deleted scene from "Love Actually" where son Bernie is chastised for his Christmas wish - for one day to be able to see farts. (Then let Grandma blame the dog!)
But if the assignment was an essay - he missed the point. There are plenty of words, but they don't give an insight into the story. As a book report, this misses some important information.
The witticisms were colorful - but not helpful in explaining what about the story caused his reaction. His feeling of sticking his head in the toilet (now, how much actual experience does Chicken have with his head in a toilet? At home or at school?) is colorful but doesn't explain why he felt that way - which would have been appropriate in an essay, even at the sixth grade level. The paper should have had more 'what it means' and less 'see, I did read it all!'
Luck!
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