Still Sucking (Dick)
Yes, I know. I am sucking at the posting. If it makes you feel any better, I am not sucking at being with Teddy Bear. In fact, I am still enjoying the shit out of myself. Tonight I am enjoying the goodness of Tequila, so I will be slightly stupider than normal. Also, I have something to ask my dear readers about...
Have you ever been in a relationship where you have no doubts? No inkling of "this just isn't right" or "I can't live with this person's blah blah and I'm just kidding myself by continuing the relationship" ??? Because I always have this little birdie sitting on my shoulder saying "Nope. You know it. I know it. It's not the one." Except. Now. The lack of doubt is creating a little insanity (okay more insanity) in my little brain. I'm just fucking happy. Ewe Girl has remarked that she's never seen me like this. Someone that doesn't know me (but knows Teddy Bear) said that I'm a bit "clingy". What? Clingy? Me? I am the anti-cling. Sometimes my friends throw me in the dryer to keep the static cling shit from happening. Really. You should see the bruises. Nasty.
So, am I totally certifiably nuts? I don't feel nuts, however I believe that's the first sign of being crazy. The total denial of insanity.
Also, some of you might have read (if I posted it) that Chicken was totally over H2 by the time I told him that we were divorcing. He said "I've been over him since the summer of 2003" (a year prior) so I take that to mean that he wasn't too broken up over the whole thing. When H3.2 moved out, Chicken shed nary a tear. Last night he told Teddy Bear that he better fucking stay with me until death do us part. Except for the use of the word "fucking". We were at dinner, after all.
Onto the funny. I'm parking at the mall yesterday (don't ask why I was there, I'm still bitter) and someone stole my parking spot right the fuck in front of me. I exclaim "Damn, cockblocked!" To which Chicken asked "What's cockblocked mean, Mommy? You know you shouldn't increase my vocabulary like that!" Fuck. Shit. Damn. Now I get to explain the delicate procedure that is cockblocking...
A few days ago Chicken is saving his video game and the screen says something like "Saving to Slot A" blah blah and I instantly crack up. Huh huh. Slot. Therefore, Chicken says "Girls have two slots. Slot A stands for Asshole and Slot B stands for Babies." Nice. Always polite and PG-rated at Sam's place.
Have you ever been in a relationship where you have no doubts? No inkling of "this just isn't right" or "I can't live with this person's blah blah and I'm just kidding myself by continuing the relationship" ??? Because I always have this little birdie sitting on my shoulder saying "Nope. You know it. I know it. It's not the one." Except. Now. The lack of doubt is creating a little insanity (okay more insanity) in my little brain. I'm just fucking happy. Ewe Girl has remarked that she's never seen me like this. Someone that doesn't know me (but knows Teddy Bear) said that I'm a bit "clingy". What? Clingy? Me? I am the anti-cling. Sometimes my friends throw me in the dryer to keep the static cling shit from happening. Really. You should see the bruises. Nasty.
So, am I totally certifiably nuts? I don't feel nuts, however I believe that's the first sign of being crazy. The total denial of insanity.
Also, some of you might have read (if I posted it) that Chicken was totally over H2 by the time I told him that we were divorcing. He said "I've been over him since the summer of 2003" (a year prior) so I take that to mean that he wasn't too broken up over the whole thing. When H3.2 moved out, Chicken shed nary a tear. Last night he told Teddy Bear that he better fucking stay with me until death do us part. Except for the use of the word "fucking". We were at dinner, after all.
Onto the funny. I'm parking at the mall yesterday (don't ask why I was there, I'm still bitter) and someone stole my parking spot right the fuck in front of me. I exclaim "Damn, cockblocked!" To which Chicken asked "What's cockblocked mean, Mommy? You know you shouldn't increase my vocabulary like that!" Fuck. Shit. Damn. Now I get to explain the delicate procedure that is cockblocking...
A few days ago Chicken is saving his video game and the screen says something like "Saving to Slot A" blah blah and I instantly crack up. Huh huh. Slot. Therefore, Chicken says "Girls have two slots. Slot A stands for Asshole and Slot B stands for Babies." Nice. Always polite and PG-rated at Sam's place.
posted by Sam at
9:52 PM
5 Comments:
LOL, your kid is gonna end up in counselling :-)
You're nuts, we all know this, but we accept you for who you are, no matter how slutty/trampy/clingy.
Yes, I have had the "no doubts EVER" thing happen. I married the son a of a bitch.
best thing that ever happened to me.
yes, I was horrified to see how clingy I was too.
Yes, i still am. It's been 10 years.
I cannot believe I have sucked the same dick for 10 years w/o any boredom. Ok SOME boredom - it is sucking dick after all.....
until i met adam the man i married last Saturday (umm there are photos up, only three yet mind you) i felt like a fuck face around every man always worrying etc..etc etc..but with adam our second date was to start when he picked me up from therapy A SHRINK and even though he had the time wrong and was an hour late and yes i thought ok fuck you corinna you don't have a guy pick you up at therapy on date two but that is also me the table is set and if you don't like it get the fuck out or i'll pick fights with you till you dump me but with him- he was a WRECK over the lateness and was trying to call me (he had no cell at the time) when he got there and i was gone cause i waited about 25 minutes till i called my girlfriend and it was odd cause i was like force crying like i KNEW something had happened something had come up or he had the time wrong i just KNEW it wasn't him i had never in my life felt that or knew that and dog darn it i was RIGHT!
adam still SUCKS with time and is late and forgets shit A LOT but I knew that on our second date and I still love him and will till we die to death.
There's so much to comment on, here. I'm going to leave the romance stuff up to the others who know all about that. I'm going to say one thing;
It would be so hard for me to decide if my 9-year-old could be friends with your 9-year-old. On the one hand, he's as funny as Barry Manillow thinking people are still interested in his 2005 calendar (still only $10.00 here). On the other hand, he does have a bit of a mature vocabulary.
But he's just so funny!
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