Want To Hump A Pole?

This is another edition of Sam's random shit post. Lots of this and that, maybe disappointing to some, possibly titilating to you freaksters.

First item of business: Where does Sam get her potty mouth from? Her mother of course. Her mother that currently thinks "sucks" is a bad word. My dad was a sailor long, long ago and my mother's mouth was worse than his when I was a wee tyke. My first word was "fuck". I swear. I mean, I promise that I swore. And still do swear. It hasn't improved much since then is what I mean to say. I do have a great self-editing feature, however. I can speak WHOLE sentences, nay even PARAGRAPHS and complete conversations without uttering even one "suck" or "dang-it". 'Cause I'm good like that. I seem to believe (probably because I'm delusional) that I have a fairly robust vocabulary even without the f's and s's and c's and so forth. The problem is... this is my blog. And I like to add the occasional "sentence enhancer" (as Patrick calls them) every now and again.

Second Item of Business: A Brief Poll. Please respond. Your very life may depend on the results. Or not. How would you prefer I respond to comments? A few bloggers (SPK & Monkey) email me at my Sam's Stories account. I really like that because I NEVER go back and see if a blogger has responded to something I say at their site. I read, comment, and then come back another day to read some more posts. My brain is too much like swiss cheese to remember where I went and when I commented. How do you feel?

How Do You Want It? Doggy Style: Email me with responses. Missionary Position: Respond in the comments section. Frigid: I don't care, just get it over with quickly. In Heat: Just give me more posting. Fuck the comment responses. Free polls from Pollhost.com

Third Item of Business: I did talk to my long-lost friend Toby. I'd give him a cutesy nick-name but I'm not in that kind of mood right now. Let us just pretend his name isn't Toby, mmkay? How did he find me? With a tiny bit of personal information and the power of the Internets. Scary. This leads me to: a new blog. This blog will stay here, and stay EXACTLY THE SAME. However, I need to vent about a certain subject that is in my real life that I do not want some "real-lifers" to know about.

It is very important that I maintain complete and UDDER (ha ha I said "udder") privacy about this particular issue. Here is how it will work: I will not link to any other blog from my new blog. I will not post the URL here. I will give out the URL if requested via email at samsstories at gmail dot com AND the powers that be grant you permission. This has absolutely NOTHING to do with any person that reads this blog. If you read this blog, this does not concern you or your actions. If you know me in real life, I will discuss it personally with you, however I will not give you the URL. Have any questions? Drop me a line or give me a call. My 900 number is still working.