Bitchin' Camaro
In this particular case, it's a bitchin' Corvette, however I really just wanted an excuse to say "bitchin' camaro". For you newer readers, my other half AKA H3.2 has a 2005 Corvette. The C6 variety I believe. The car is HOT. It actually can substitute for foreplay, it is that fucking great! Although I love this car it has some issues, similar to every relationship that we have in life. Some of you might have thought I was telling a "Sam's Story" when I said H3.2 had a new Vette. This story should change that perception in a typical Sam way.
I expect a little hiccup every now and then from my car. It is eight years old and has almost 100,000 miles on its beautiful body. However, it's a Honda. I can drive it for another 100,000 miles if I want to, and it's paid off so I can do more useful things with my money. Like going to strip clubs and paying for private lap dances.
This Corvette may be real purdy and go real fast, but it sucks on the whole reliability front. It's like having access to a very expensive and talented whore that only works once a month. The rest of the time you have to resort to your hand. Similar to Phuk Yu's problem (see prior post). The MSRP on this car is $55,000 as configured. One would think that for this kind of money, you would get a car that doesn't need to visit the dealership for at least six months. Nope, this car is in the shop AGAIN. For the THIRD time. This time the dealer thinks the motor is shot, and either needs to be rebuilt or completely replaced. It has 6,000 miles on it. Not to mention numerous other squeaks and annoyances that H3.2 has to deal with on a daily basis.
Are you waiting for the funny part? Me too! The dealer said that the Vette will be in the shop for 3-4 weeks. Then they said that they could give H3.2 a rental for a couple of days. Make any sense to you? H3.2 has another car, but it is not a daily driver. It's a Datsun that he is restoring, and he doesn't want to use it for the next month straight. For you car enthusiasts, H3.2 has provided a description for you:
H3.2 and his friend Sparky went to the dealer today to obtain a rental car. Every single car was already taken, save one. A Chevrolet Cargo van, which they happily offered H3.2. The nice girl at the counter was quick to point out the stunning features of this van, which included no rear or side windows. "It would be great to hot box," she said. OMG. Sparky chimed in with a "We could get a sound system installed and play the Ice Cream Truck song to lure little kids inside, ha ha!" Then the not-so-nice girl at the counter recounted the time where she had seen a porn clip online that featured two guys that drive around in a bus and pick up chicks and film it... AKA Bangbus. Please do not click on this link with children around. H3.2 and Sparky knew exactly what she was talking about and happily conversed about this bit of internet culture. Did I say WHAT THE FUCK?
The icky counter girl then asked H3.2 what kind of car he had brought in for service. When he told her, she gushed "Oh wow, how can a 26 year old buy a new Corvette?" Dumb bitch. THEN they bantered back and forth about how he paid cash for it (joking) and how he must be selling something else to pay cash.... and "please Mr. Corvette owner leave a little of your stash in the glove compartment for me". Anyone want to come with my to the local GM/Chevrolet dealer to kick a little slutty counter girl ass?
The whore offered the van/herself for the afternoon, but H3.2 declined and asked her to call him when she/a car was available. She's married, so I'm assuming/hoping that a car will be available first. GM has agreed (after much complaint) to let H3.2 have a rental for the duration of the repairs.
On a sidenote, I did not intend this post to end up as a rant about the damn counter girl. As I was typing, I messaged H3.2 for details about Bangbus (I had never heard of it) and other parts of the story. That's when I heard about the blatant flirting/gushing behavior and decided to get my posse together for a whoop-ass session. Say 3:00pm at the bicycle racks?
I expect a little hiccup every now and then from my car. It is eight years old and has almost 100,000 miles on its beautiful body. However, it's a Honda. I can drive it for another 100,000 miles if I want to, and it's paid off so I can do more useful things with my money. Like going to strip clubs and paying for private lap dances.
This Corvette may be real purdy and go real fast, but it sucks on the whole reliability front. It's like having access to a very expensive and talented whore that only works once a month. The rest of the time you have to resort to your hand. Similar to Phuk Yu's problem (see prior post). The MSRP on this car is $55,000 as configured. One would think that for this kind of money, you would get a car that doesn't need to visit the dealership for at least six months. Nope, this car is in the shop AGAIN. For the THIRD time. This time the dealer thinks the motor is shot, and either needs to be rebuilt or completely replaced. It has 6,000 miles on it. Not to mention numerous other squeaks and annoyances that H3.2 has to deal with on a daily basis.
Are you waiting for the funny part? Me too! The dealer said that the Vette will be in the shop for 3-4 weeks. Then they said that they could give H3.2 a rental for a couple of days. Make any sense to you? H3.2 has another car, but it is not a daily driver. It's a Datsun that he is restoring, and he doesn't want to use it for the next month straight. For you car enthusiasts, H3.2 has provided a description for you:
- 1971 Datsun 240z, partially restored, L24 bottomend, highlift cam, turbo head, triple Webber dcoe40 carbs, roll bar, cobra suzuka race buckets w/ 5 point harness and blah blah blah...
- less than 10mpg
- 91 octane
- gas eating machine
- stinky
H3.2 and his friend Sparky went to the dealer today to obtain a rental car. Every single car was already taken, save one. A Chevrolet Cargo van, which they happily offered H3.2. The nice girl at the counter was quick to point out the stunning features of this van, which included no rear or side windows. "It would be great to hot box," she said. OMG. Sparky chimed in with a "We could get a sound system installed and play the Ice Cream Truck song to lure little kids inside, ha ha!" Then the not-so-nice girl at the counter recounted the time where she had seen a porn clip online that featured two guys that drive around in a bus and pick up chicks and film it... AKA Bangbus. Please do not click on this link with children around. H3.2 and Sparky knew exactly what she was talking about and happily conversed about this bit of internet culture. Did I say WHAT THE FUCK?The icky counter girl then asked H3.2 what kind of car he had brought in for service. When he told her, she gushed "Oh wow, how can a 26 year old buy a new Corvette?" Dumb bitch. THEN they bantered back and forth about how he paid cash for it (joking) and how he must be selling something else to pay cash.... and "please Mr. Corvette owner leave a little of your stash in the glove compartment for me". Anyone want to come with my to the local GM/Chevrolet dealer to kick a little slutty counter girl ass?
The whore offered the van/herself for the afternoon, but H3.2 declined and asked her to call him when she/a car was available. She's married, so I'm assuming/hoping that a car will be available first. GM has agreed (after much complaint) to let H3.2 have a rental for the duration of the repairs.
On a sidenote, I did not intend this post to end up as a rant about the damn counter girl. As I was typing, I messaged H3.2 for details about Bangbus (I had never heard of it) and other parts of the story. That's when I heard about the blatant flirting/gushing behavior and decided to get my posse together for a whoop-ass session. Say 3:00pm at the bicycle racks?
posted by Sam at
1:47 PM
4 Comments:
I would like to chime in on this post...
I believe that most Corvettes will fair better than mine has, this while being the about as bad as it gets, the whole motor grenading thing, is the first major problem the car has been in for. Although I was just waiting for a good reason to take it in for an oil consumption test due to its burning oil and have them look at the shifter/gear bind/jam issue that rears its ugly head if you drive it hard... Most of the previous issues are just annoyances, or as old timers would put it, "character" or "personality" of the car. Prior dealer visits were just for misc rattles and annoyances you would not expect a $55k or the "Premier American Sportscar" to exhibit.
One of my favorite quotes relating to this car was "Well we heard back from GM about the rattles and squeaks you were complaining about, they said its a sportscar so it is expected to rattle and squeak a bit", while the service advisor told me this I was thinking in the back of my head, my friends new Porsche doesnt squeak or rattle and I doubt a Ferrari or Lamborghini would either... Hell the car has more rattles, Um... personality, than my old 1998 Honda Civic with 60k on the clock did, a car that had much more abuse than the Corvette has ever seen.
I believe most manufacturers have major issues with a few brand new cars every year, but the majority are fine. I guess I am just lucky... I am with Sam right?
Couple of things Sam.
My first car was a Vette - they are HAWT - you are right - and you are also
right in assuming that they are expensive and in
need of repair quite a bit.
Forget the 6 months.
Okay - here's one - I believe the only part of Vette, because it is fiberglass that can rust is
the undercarriage.
I know I'm a woman who didn't question things, (go ahead laugh) but I paid 800.00 way back then
for a new undercarriage - that was just the start.
Hope H3.2 and you have better luck than I did - but I am STILL very glad
I had a corvette in my life, (second car also)
but due to winter conditions.
Okay, Sam, enough about the vettes - you said 3 p.m. right?
Cathi
First of all, WHAT A SLUT!
Second of all, trade it.
yes H3.2 you are damn lucky cause you are with Sam...she rocks!!
and Sam, i am so with you...3pm, bicycle racks... :)
peace...
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